Oh Boy!
By  Arami Vahagn, Atropos, Foxmonkey, Jenn M.,  Lorraine, MB,
Melanie, Narcissus, Oshun, Selursera, Shamenka, Steelknight, Thamiris
Ares rolled away from Annie, sighing deeply.  He had missed Joxer, and Annie was every bit as imaginative in bed as the long-dead, other version had been.

"That was great!" he gasped.

"Yeah, wasn't it?" Annie grinned, ever so glad she had replaced Harry with Ares.

Before they could recover, the bedroom door crashed open to admit one irate Demigod, Guest of Honor, Actor, humorless brother called Hercules.

"What are you doing here, Ares? Kevin Smith is due here.  You can't both be here!" Then he noticed the naked woman. "Lucy!?" he squeaked.

"No, I'm Annie, I'm your brother's new favorite fuck toy."  She grabbed him by the collar pulling him on top of her.  Wrapping her legs around his hips, she rocked her cunt against his groin.

Hercules moaned his cock hardening and he pushed back.  With a  gesture Ares made his clothes disappear and his cock entered her and they rocked together in mindless lust.

Ares glanced up as a whisper of power announced his sister.

She winked.  *I  told you I could get him here,* she whispered in his mind.  Her hand fingered her cunt as Ares rolled on top of his half-brother entering him with a single smooth thrust.

Iolaus burst in.  "Hercules …Oh my god..."

"...of war!" Annie shouted in ecstasy.

Iolaus could barely tear his eyes away from the rutting threesome to gape at Aphrodite, her delicate long-fingered hand still pleasuring her cunt.

"Discord? What are you doing here?"

"Getting ready for a damn fine time.  Why don't you lose that patchwork vest and join me, hmmm?"

"Gee, I don't know, I've got to think about th--okay!" With an ear-splitting yelp, Iolaus tore his clothing off as he pounced on the fair haired goddess.

"Yeowza, Curly! Go easy, huh? This isn't Ares you're fucking here, pal..."

Iolaus stopped mid-thrust, his thick cock poised for a foray into the Goddess of Love. "You're right...what in Tartarus am I thinking?" He leered over at the war god's delicious ass, only to have 'Dite pull his head between her thighs.

"My turn first, Shorty. I've heard you have an immensely talented tongue.  Show me!"

Iolaus complied happily.  If he could make the Goddess of Love scream with pleasure, he'd become a legend.

Briefly, only slurps, sighs, moans, and groans sounded in the room.  Then the doorbell rang.

"I'll get it," Ares growled, pulling out of his brother.  Truth be told, Herc just wasn't that good a fuck.  No imagination.  Besides, Ares only liked orgies where he was the centerpiece.  Sauntering to the door, Ares opened it.  It was that writer, Jerry
something. Bulging biceps, taut abs.  Definite possibilities here.  Ares ...


Bodies melted, then faded as Zeus thrust his hand into the scrying pool. Even as rings of blue water rippled with his anger, he snapped his fingers.

Instantly, the air wafted sweet with wine, and Dionysus appeared.  Yes, Father?"  He stood casually, right hip jutting forward, and his short leather tunic parted obscenely.  Gold shimmered there, coils of it, like the ringlets that dangled to his slim shoulders.

"I need your help."  The words bounced between the marble pillars.

"Help for my mother's killer?"

Zeus stared into eyes ringed orange by the Semelian fire.  "It's for our future."

A laugh like moonlight.  "What do you want?"

"Only this: kill Joxer."

Dionysus arched his eyebrow. "You mean the mortal that Ares seems to be enamored of?"

Zeus nodded.

"Why? With the way that Joxer stumbles around, it is only a matter of time before he dies in some stupid accident."

Zeus' fist slammed into the edge of the pool, cracking the fine marble.  "Why? Because that idiot son of mine is thinking of granting the fool immortality. He is making Ares soft. He spends less time fighting and more time fucking. I can't let this happen. We need his strength to fight the coming Twilight of the Gods.  I will not let us become the pathetic beings in the pool! Understand me?"

"As you wish, Father," Dionysus said, as he disappeared from Olympus only to
reappear on a battlefield outside of Thebes. He stood next to a lone figure observing the carnage taking place before them. He never really liked her, but knew he would need an ally if he were to carry out his father's wishes.

The goddess turned and looked at him disdainfully, "What do you want?" she hissed.

"How would you like to help me do something for Zeus and possibly get one step closer to the position of God of War?"

"Okay, you have my attention.  I'm listening," Discord said.

"Zeus wants Joxer dead and I know you love to wreak havoc.  Ares is losing his edge. He's fallen for the baffoon and more interested in making love, not war."

Discord was sickened by the thought of her former lover fucking the pasty-assed mortal. "I'd be happy to take care of the little worm, but why should I risk my ass? You know if Ares finds out I did in his bitch, he'll fry me. Besides, how is my offing the little worm going to get me closer to being Goddess of War?"

"Zeus wants this done immediately and if you're not goddess enough to handle the job, I'll have to hand it over to Demios."  Dionysus shrugged and turned away, preparing to leave.

"Wait."  Discord frowned.  "Do you have a plan?"

Dionysus smiled inwardly with triumph.  "Yes, but it's complicated.   Let's go
somewhere quiet so we can discuss it."  The two flashed away from the battlefield.


"Are you sure?"  Ares' voice shook with fury.

The little muse hesitantly nodded.  "They didn't know I was there. I'm sorry, Ares.  There's nothing more I can do, but I did want to warn you."  Ares nodded absently and watched her disappear.  Then he  began to smile, and in a bright flash, Ares, his sword and his lover appeared in a dim, quiet throne room.

"Lord Hades, I need your help,"  Ares said respectfully.

"Ares, you need my help? Can't you ask anyone else? I'm still so buried in paperwork from the last centuries. Just the dead from wars alone have Persephone thinking about staying with her mother for our six months. Because I never have anytime to be with her.

Charon's bitching again about unionizing. The people in the Elysian fields suddenly have to have cable and VCR's. Someone sent me a complaint saying the Elysian field's were Tartarus. Because they couldn't watch something called MTV. Yet you need my help about what?  A guy whose been dead how many times before. What do you think the reincarnation thing is without paperwork?"

Ares made an effort not to smirk.  He might think Hades was ill-fitted to be a glorifed administrator, but he did need his assistance.

"We're not quite up to the death part yet; I'm still trying to keep Joxer alive. Not that I don't appreciate your offer, or anything, but can resurrection be Plan B?"

Hades grunted approval.

"The way I see it, we know our enemies' weaknesses. Discord's a vindictive cow. She just won't let go of a grudge, no matter what, but Dionysus?  Let's face it, he's smashed
about 90 percent of the time - can't keep his mind on the job. What I need from you is to get  hold of  a carafe of his Ambrosia wine. You let me do the rest.  There’s only one thing more I need.”


Aphrodite giggled as Ares told her the plan and why he needed her help.  “Let me get this straight: you want a love potion to stick in Dio’s wine, and for me to make sure he AND Discord drink it? You do realize what happens when you mix love and wine?”

Ares grinned as he took the small vile.  “Of course.  That’s the plan.”

“Kewl!  I’ve wanted to get back at the “Goddess of Skank” for awhile, and I can’t think of a better way....”


Once again Zeus dipped his hand into the shining surface of the scrying pool, then turned to Dionysus.  "Ares' love for Joxer clouds his judgment."  Zeus' brow creased briefly. "He will not learn."  A single pass over the pool stilled the waters.

Dionysus turned his ever-present goblet between his hands, and leaned in to watch himself talking with Discord. "This will never happen."  Softly, "Joxer's death will be swift."

Zeus' aged, magnificent face briefly reflected sorrow. "It must be done."


There was no complicated plan, no double-cross - just a crowded tavern and an over-filled goblet of wine.  Turning to apologize, Joxer slipped in the spill and fell...and saw Elysia.

The End

If you have any questions, contact Thamiris

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