Thamiris woke to a chill in her bones and a throbbing headache. "That's the last time I go out with those Strifians, they are just too much for me." Shaking away visions of Cheez Whiz and restraints, she finally noticed that she was not in the comfy bedroom she shared with her husband.
She was in a bed, though, and she was not alone. Laying face down on the sumptuous bed, was a muscular body, with a head of tousled red gold curls.
"Iphicles!" she shouted.
The king turned over, still half-asleep. "Ares?"
"No, my love, it's Thamiris."
"I want Ares." Iphicles pouted masterfully.
Tham pouted too. She'd had any number of fantasies involving her beloved King, yet she had never even considered that he would prefer the Big Bad God of War over her, the Bestest List Mistress. She did the only thing she could think of that might help. She kissed those full lips, running her hands through his silky hair; which came off in her hands when she began to pull on it slightly.
"A wig?" Tham cried.
"Well, Tham, I think that the red gold goes much better with my blue dress, wait, I'll show you."
Tham watched Iphy jump to his closet, throwing robes, and lots of jewelry in every direction until his gleeful "Aha!" signaled that he had found what he was looking for in the closet.
"Close your eyes, Tham."
Tham heard rustling of cloth, and more than a few colorful curses she would remember for future use. Within a few minutes, everything was silent.
"OK, open your eyes."
Tham opened her eyes, then closed them again. The image was burned on her retinas forever. Her wonderful, masculine king was wearing a dress. That was shocking enough, but it got worse. It was an ugly dress, a muu-muu to be exact. Bright blue flowers on a yellow background. Iphicles was also wearing enough cheap costume jewelry to open his own shop. A red purse, sandals, and a lopsided bonnet completed the ensemble.
"So, what do you think?" Iphicles asked innocently.
Tham's only answer was a piercing scream, and a muffled thud as she fainted onto the pillow.
"nononononono" Tham mumbled as she felt someone shaking her awake.
"Wake up, Tham, you're having a nightmare."
Tham shot up from the floor, surrounded by Strife, Kitkat, and a few other mischievous faces. The smiles on their faces told Tham all she needed to know. The depths that they had sunk to, had left her speechless.
Strife just smiled, wrapping one arm around Tham, the other around Kitkat. "Don't worry babe, we love ya. We just wanted to have a little fun, ok?"
Knowing the look on Tham's face, Kitkat whispered to Strife "Let's get the hell outta here!"
Tham was about the let loose with another scream when a large hand landed on her shoulder. Then she felt another hand slide down and massage her breast. Meanwhile, a hot mouth began to work on her suddenly exposed clit. Opening her eyes, she saw Ares, Cupid God of War, and Caesar all writhing around her as they sunk to the floor.
"Kitkat said to say Happy Little Christmas, BLM. We're here to make sure you get all the presents you deserve." Ares whispered before kissing her hungrily.