By Jade Marmalade
"I hate this!
"Now, Iolaus, come on--you volunteered."
"Why couldn't we stand guard, or oversee the dinner, or take out a big ugly monster or something, huh? I tell you Herc, this stuff is not for me!"
Hercules sighed in exasperation with his partner. "We promised to help Iphicles out. This is his big day. We owe it to him and Rena. They shouldn't have to worry about cleaning on their wedding day."
Iolaus just groaned and covered his face with the damp cloth he was using to dust the palace cabinets. Hercules heard him mumble something like "over worked, underpaid, not cut out for this..." under his breath. He just grinned, ignoring his friends complaints, and continued sweeping.
Hercules heard giggling and turned to see a gaggle of the palace serving wenches staring at them. They were blushing, giggling, and gossiping.
"Great, just great," Iolaus moaned. "Now I'm going to have reputation for being a maid. I'll never get a date again!"
Hercules said nothing and continued to work. He acutally found it rather pleasant--not like his usual labors. 'I wish you ever date anyone else but me,' Hercules thought. Then he supressed the longings that he had dealt with for as long as he had known the ex-thief and warrior, and went back to his task, ignoring the servents.
"Well, this is something I never thought I'd see."
The son of Zeus turned again to see his mortal half-brother enter the chamber. "Iphicles! What are you doing here? You should be getting dressed for the ceremony."
Iphicles grimaced. "Have you seen the outfit they want to put me in? It's horrible! All sorts of scratchy gold braid, a stiff collar, enought jewelry to support a small kingdom....."
"Well," Iolaus said, "You know Rena's dad. He wanted the best for his daughter but had to settle for you so he's at least trying to make you look the part of a proper husband to a princess."
Iphicles glared at Iolaus for a moment before they both burst out laughing. Hercules grinned uncertainly. They both had really odd senses of humor as far as he was concerned.
"Hey, Iph, couldn't you give me something else to do?" Iolaus whined. "I could go catch some rabbits for the wedding feast or something. Anything would be better than dusting!"
Iphicles appeared to consider it for a moment. Hercules started to get worried when a wicked glint lighted his brothers eyes. "Why, yes Iolaus. There's nothing I'd like better than for you to catch some bunnies for me."
Iolaus was relieved. "Thanks, man..."
"Dust bunnies, that is," the former mercenary continued.
"Dust bunnies...?" Iolaus said, mouth hanging open.
"Yes. I think there's one right now, hiding behind that chair." Iphicles pointed to a particularly dusty corner and grinned with evil glee at his brother's friend.
Iolaus turned to look at the dust, while Iphicles stauntered away to prepare for his nuptials.
Hercules smothered his laugh behind his hand. The look of pure horror on Iolaus' face; now that was funny!